Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Friday, April 10, 2009
Friday Funny....Panties on the plane
There were three black ladies getting ready to take a plane trip fo r the first time.The first lady said, I don't know about you, but I'mgonna wear me some hot pink panties before I get on that plane.""Why you gonna wear them?" the other two asked? The first replied, " Cause, if that plane goes down, and I'm out there laying butt-up in a cornfield, they’re gonna find me first."
The second lady said, "Well, I'm gonna wearme some florescent orange panties. "Why you gonna wear them?" the others asked. The second lady answered, "Cause if this here plane is goin' down and I’m floating butt-up in the 0cean, they will see me first." The third lady says, "Well, I'm not gonna wearany panties...."What?............ No panties?............" the others asked in disbelief. The third lady says, "That's right girlfriends, you’re hearing me right. I ain't wearing any panties, cause if this plane goes down, honey,they’ll always look for the black box first."
The second lady said, "Well, I'm gonna wearme some florescent orange panties. "Why you gonna wear them?" the others asked. The second lady answered, "Cause if this here plane is goin' down and I’m floating butt-up in the 0cean, they will see me first." The third lady says, "Well, I'm not gonna wearany panties...."What?............ No panties?............" the others asked in disbelief. The third lady says, "That's right girlfriends, you’re hearing me right. I ain't wearing any panties, cause if this plane goes down, honey,they’ll always look for the black box first."
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Moving....again.
So...we are moving. We've been living in a townhome for the last year, and I'm going crazy. We have the wackiest neighbors, and a murder (yes, I said MURDER) happened about a month ago a block and a half from where we live. Well, needless to say I started looking at new places. Our lease was up March 6th, so hubby and I started looking around to see what kind of deals were out there since the market in this area has taken a complete nose dive. We had walked through this amazing property and noticed the sign said for sale or lease, but surely this place wouldn't accept dogs. We were wrong they did and I'm so excited cause we are going have at least 1000 more square feet and two more bedrooms. I'll post some pics as soon as we get moved in.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
SWIMMING!
Bailey has been taken swimming lessons weekly for sometime now, and she's getting really comfortable in the water now. Here are a few pics from her lesson last week.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Futurity...
I was home last weekend for the NCHA Cutting Horse Furturity...I had a blast. I ran into people I hadn't seen in years, including the trainer I used to for. Funny cause he and his wife almost didn't recognize me, I guess that tells me just how far removed I am from what was my "old life"...either that or I am aging poorly!!! I really miss it, the whole thing...the way people sit around in eachothers booths having a beer and shootin the breeze, and before you know it there's an impromtu concert with some cowboy and his buddies. I feel so at "home" there and it's like I never left. I had chance to get swung around the dancefloor, and remember the days I was sneaking in the back door or the bar hoping I wouldn't get caught by the bouncers. Oh what fun! I was so sad when I drove home about how much I would miss it all that I cried the whole way. I guees time to put up the boots and rhinestones and pull out the flip flops and Uggs again....Here's to hoping I'll be back soon.....real, real soon.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Why do we love children?
IF THIS DOES NOT BRIGHTEN YOUR DAY TURN OFF YOUR COMPUTER AND GO BACK TO BED.
1) NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'
2) OPINIONS On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'
3) KETCHUP A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.'
4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'
5) POLICE # 1 While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'
6) POLICE # 2 It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake , was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'
7) ELDERLY While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'
8) DRESS-UP A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.' 'And why not, darling?' 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning'
9) DEATH While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Son, and into the hole he goes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)
10) SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school . 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'
11) BIBLE A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out. 'What have you got there, dear?' With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!'
1) NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'
2) OPINIONS On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'
3) KETCHUP A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.'
4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'
5) POLICE # 1 While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'
6) POLICE # 2 It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake , was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'
7) ELDERLY While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'
8) DRESS-UP A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.' 'And why not, darling?' 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning'
9) DEATH While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Son, and into the hole he goes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)
10) SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school . 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'
11) BIBLE A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out. 'What have you got there, dear?' With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!'
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Samantha Who....
Love this show. Good question was posed on the show this week....does everyone have a "fallback guy/gal" kind of like the one person you could always fall back to if your current relationship didn't work out. I think everyone has at least one person in mind. Just made me think...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
